Ramblings of a Portfolio Manager

Greek for Dummies… and PIGS

With all the news surrounding the PIGS last week, particularly Greece, we thought it would be helpful if we provided a little primer to help investors understand some of the more complex Hellenic financial terms flying around the airwaves. So here, in the language of Aeschylus, is the week in review:

hypokrites. n. Gk a stage actor, hence one who pretends to be what he is not. See also oraculum. v. L to plead. ME hypocrite: one who denounces derivatives as “financial weapons of mass destruction” prior to emerging as one of the largest investors in said weapons and criticizing the Government’s plan to regulate such.

amnestía. n. Gk oblivion. See also ME hypocrite. ME amnesia: a group that protests the “cost to taxpayers” of bailing out Wall Street, which paid the Government back in full plus interest, “forgetting” that its own constituency placed taxpayers in the same situation with GM, receiving ownership in the Company in return while being allowed to pay back those taxpayers with their own money ( i.e. TARP funds).

phone. n. Gk sound, voice. See also L senatus, council of elders. See also ME hypocrite. ME phoney: 1: someone who takes money from another and in return puts the donor through a public show trial to enhance the probability of re-election. 2: public criticism of an institution for “adding no value” by an individual who destroys value. See also slang doddism n. cognitive deterioration.

moros. n. Gk foolish, stupid. See also ME worthless. ME moron: 1: one who helps create a global Standard of being Poor. 2: a group or entity paid to opine on the financial health of another and who, having failed spectacularly, downgrades the debt rating of a sovereign entity in obvious financial distress, after the value of that entity’s bonds has already declined 38%, hoping no-one notices.

eirene. n. Gk oil. See also ME double standard, fr. Gk diploos + histanai, to cause to stand twice. ME oil: A value system under which an environmental disaster is never the fault of philosophically liberal politicians or government entities, even when they publicly support the conditions that created the disaster in the first place.

Next week, depending upon which of the PIGS makes the headlines, we will explore the romance languages.

Please call for this weeks highlighted stocks.